Siciliano's Seven

(Click on the chart to view standings)
To see everyone's picks and a full standings breakdown, click here.

What's up, Cats and Kittens?

After a month of gracing us with his inspired prose, Ben has requested a well deserved week off. So, in Ben's absence, he called me in from the bullpen to provide an inning of relief pitching from a fresh arm while he takes the week off to rejuvenate his creative juices. 
Because my services will only be used sporadically and there is a an avalanche of American Idol brilliance swirling around in my brain, I've chosen to break from Idol blog tradition and just go with a rambling, free-flowing stream of consciousness before getting to last weeks recap. Due to the length, feel free to skip over the blog and go straight to the standings, but know that your soul will be forever destitute and empty for doing so.

IDOL THOUGHTS

Count me amongst the millions that missed most of Adam Lampbert's performance last week thanks to the show's battle royal with my DVR timer. Really Fox? Eight singers plus judges. Nobody thought last week's show might go longer than 60 minutes? Not one staffer raised this possibilty?... 

In the 4th season of Idol, with eight weeks left, Simon made a prediction that Carrie Underwood would not only win the competition but would "sell more records than any previous Idol contestant." Of course, she did both. After one performance this season, Paula made a prediction Lil Rounds should get ready to be in the finals. I'll let you fill in your own joke for that one....

This show makes 26 quadrillion dollars. It's historically popular. It's totally reinvented the television landscape. And they still can't figure something  out to help Simon hear the contestants when they are talking. It's pretty impressive, actually. I'm keeping count of the times he has to lean over and whisper "What did he say?" We're approaching the triple digits....

Gots to give the Idols credit, they've really chosen some classic songs. Between Lampbert's version of "Tracks of my Tears" and Allison's "I Can't Make You Love Me" by Bonnie Raitt, those are two of the greatest songs of all time....

I just re-read that last thought. I really need a girlfriend...

What's with the blatant lip-synching in the group performances? Where they always doing this? Two weeks ago, it looked like a Bruce Lee kung fu movie up there....

Ever notice Paula speaks in sentence fragments after a bad performance? "You are ........ a brilliant vocalist ...... but that ....... only gets you so far....Not your best." In the words of the Billy Madison, T-T-T-TODAY JUNIOR! ....

Hey Annop!  You seem like a good guy. Probably fun to hang with. Having said that, I really hope you have someone keeping detailed notes for you in that science lecture down at UNC. People aren't going to pay real money to hear/see you perform ....

I've been trying to figure out why Adam brings out the inner-jock in me. (I always find myself fighting a strong desire to pummel him.) And I think I've figured it out: I like weirdness. I embrace people who are kind of quirky and different. But I can't stand people who TRY to be weird and different. Adam strikes me as the kind of kid that goes waaay out of his way so that people will think he's edgy. The kid is from Pasadena. Stop with the black nail polish before take your lunch money...


This is killing me. Count how many times the judges uses this phrase: "You know what I love about ______"
A) "you..." 
B) "that performance..."
C) "this show..."
D) "pork chops ..."  

(D. is for Randy only)

This phrase is used at least twice a week. It's really starting to get to me. We need to either get the producer to cut the microphone of any judge that starts a sentence with that phrase OR create the first ever Idol drinking game. One of the two.

As for our pool, Melissa Clement continues to lead with the Amatangelo sisters close behind. And my cousin Jay sits in last. I mean, dead last. (Just wanted to highlight that.) 

This week's theme is Scenes From The Cinema, with mentor Quentin Tarantino. No, I'm not kidding. I'll wait a second while you read that sentence again.

(waiting...)

OK, so for pool purposes I need a strong performance from Lil. But if momentum means anything (and I think Lindsey Lohan has proven that it does), it looks like either Ms. Rounds or Anoop could get sent packing tonight. Then again, this week just has the feel of one of those shocking eliminations, so watch out. That would be fun.

Yo, you know what I love about shocking eliminations.........
 
--Mike Sis

The Questionably-Elite Eight

(Click on the chart to view standings)
To see everyone's picks and a full standings breakdown, click here.

Yes folks, Eight contestants remain after the shameless "Songs that are on iTunes" week, and thankfully, mercifully, gloriously, Megan Joy is not one of them. The awkward-dancing, sleeve-o-tats-having, Amy Winehouse-esque, crooner opted to cover Bob Marley and instead of being shown the love she was shown the door. But Megan wasn't the only contestant to turn in a sub-par performance in last week's show and with a seemly limitless choice of songs, there were more misses than hits.

Not the worst performance, but certainly the most disappointing, was Lil, who played it safe yet again, choosing a yawn-o-riffic Celine Dion ballad instead of something, anything with some swagger to it. What the hell happened to the Lil Rounds that came out blazing to Mary J. Blige in the top 36? Where's the attitude? If Lil get's any whiter this week, she'll be gone.

And speaking of being white ... Anoop ... seriously ... Usher?! No Anoop. Just ... no.

Danny Gokey was solid and picked a pretty risky song but I wouldn't have piled on the praise as much as the Judges did.

Matt Giraud singing the Fray was, to me, a lot less mediocre than I usually find him. But the Judges hated it, so clearly I just don't get this kid.

Adam Lampbert was obnoxious as usual but the judges didn't heap the attention on him as they usually do so I won't either.

Allison Iraheta has the perfect voice to sing No Doubt but her attempt at playing the guitar was absolutely useless. She only played for about 12 seconds before swinging the guitar behind her back where it sort of handcuffed her the rest of the way through the performance. She could have tore that song up but instead she just sort of stood in front of the mic looking awkward.

Scott was actually not that bad this week. Billy Joel was a good fit and he finally turned in a solid vocal. But the hair do ... really. You're lucky you're blind Scott, or there would really be no excuse for that.

Ok, Ok, enough venom. Because there was one performance that made it all worth while. Kris "formerly-most-forgetable-contestant" Allen was absolutely smokin' doing "Ain't No Sunshine". It was original, inventive and full of punch. Kris gets better every week. He's got a John Mayer, Jason Mraz-y style that's very relevant. He's a cool young married guy which I've gotta get behind, and I've gotta say, the guy I once thought was too boring to make it past the first round is fast becoming my favorite contestant.

Not much movement in the pool this week, Most people had Megan out already so Melissa Clement remains in front with Amy A. nipping at her heels. People are starting to have fewer red marks though as we reach the middle of the pack so it's still anyone's pool (well, almost anyone's) This week the Idols will be singing songs from the year they were born and Allison Iraheta will make us all feel old when she drops a top hit of 1993 ... sadly, she could sing No Doubt again if she wanted to. The Swami says: "Get yourselves a good dose of Anoop Dogg this week - It will be your last chance."

Make sure you come back next week when Mike Siciliano will take the reigns as guest-blogger for some fresh-perspective snarkiness - See you then!